I FOUGHT ALSATIAN GUARD DOGS

THE FIRST DOG

The job took much longer than expected - but it had to be done. The microphone system had broken down that night, and had to be fixed by next day when a number of top acts were booked for a big night's entertainment. I was the only Engineer available for the job, and I worked single-handed on it into the night, messing about with amplifiers and all sorts of electronic stuff to try to make sure that the comedian's jokes could be heard, that the singers would sound OK, and that the musical instruments would be played and also heard well.
Even at 1-am the job was not complete and it would take another 1/2 hour before the sound system in the club was ready for use next day. I was crossing the dance floor in the darkened club when I heard some ominous sounds - the rapid skittering of powerful paws on the wooden dance floor and a loud and ominous growling. In the semi - darkness a large Alsatian guard - dog was rushing toward me at what seemed like the speed of an express train. It was obviously extremely hostile and I thought - I will never escape from this by running; better to face it and fight. In the seconds before it reached me I decided to protect my throat and wrapped my right arm around my throat.
Seconds later my right arm was seized by the powerful jaws of the dog, and I thought: "If I pull, this is what the dog expects, so I will push"and I pushed my arm down the dog's throat and grabbed a few things down there. By now the dog was at my mercy, as it was trying desperately to escape, but I could move forward faster than the dog could move backwards, and the dog was by then unable to inflict a serious bite. I carried on pushing the dog backwards, meanwhile shouting loudly for help until the dog-handler arrived and took charge of the dog.
I pointed out most emphatically that it was very fortunate that I had been able to handle the attack without serious injury. For the Reader of this story it is worth knowing, that once a dog's mouth is occupied it is usually unable to do a great deal of harm.
When this powerful Alsatian guard dog attacked me it soon found that it had bitten more than it could chew, and was unable to do me any serious harm.